top of page

Caught With Multiple Pencils After Telling Everyone She Didn’t Have Extras


Last week during American Literature, a plethora of unused pencils spilled from Sarah Crabb’s bag as she tried to take out her notebook just minutes after telling Khai Kieu she didn't have one he could borrow. As Sarah fumbled to grab them, each pencil loudly clattered to the floor making sure everyone in the room saw just how many she was packing. “I had to write with a partially melted crayon I managed to scavenge from the trash can,” Kieu said as he tried to accept this cold act of betrayal. Other students recall previous incidents in which Crabb also claimed to be low on surplus writing utensils, but many are starting to question the legitimacy of these statements. Despite this revelation, Crabb seems less than apologetic. “Why should I have to lend out pencils that I bought?” she reasons. “Do you know how many people bite their nails at this school? I don’t want their disgusting hands fondling my pencils.” When questioned what she would do if she ever needed to borrow a pencil, Crabb simply laughed and walked away.


bottom of page